Month: August 2019

Recently, my van ran out of gas (notice how I made it sound like it was the van’s fault?). When we added a couple of gallons, we were able to get to the gas station, but just barely. The van jerked and shuddered, refusing to go over 35mph the whole way. Once we filled up the tank, however, everything was back to normal. We could go whatever speed we and the great state of Alabama agreed was safe, and the 30 mile trip home passed just as it should.

Sometimes, we Christians live like my van ran on the way to the gas station. We know “Jesus loves me,” but we don’t know Jesus so we are not functioning as we were designed by our creator to function.

Look at this sentence- “Whoever keeps his word, in him truly the love of God is perfected.”

Powerful words!

The thing is, we keep his words when we spend time with him. Our kids mimic us (for better for for worse) because they spend time with us. Genetics matter, but I’m adopted so I am here to tell you that when people told me I was just like my mom or my dad, I knew why.

Time and love.

God made his love abundantly clear. When we spend time with him- in his word, in prayer, in company with his children- we become more of what we were created to be, and that is what obedience looks like.

Some things make no sense to me. Like when my daughters, who both have beautiful, curly, thick hair spend hours straightening it. I would have done things I am ashamed to admit to have had their curls in high school! But straight is the thing these days, so … gotta fit in.

Or do they? Honestly, I think mostly my girls just want something different some days, and that’s fine. But as we think about our kids (and ourselves) “walking in the light” I’ve been thinking about self- examination. And you know, I think it’s more than just looking back over our days to reflect on what we have done or left undone as we confess our sins. There has to be another question we have to ask ourselves, which is- “why?”

Are we walking in obedience, or are we walking in conformity?

It matters. “Walking in the light” is walking with God, who is light- which means that if we are looking for the approval of friends or just trying to fit in we are deceiving ourselves. Straightening our hair is fine if we just want to change up the look. Watching what we eat is good if we want to be healthy. Speaking kind words is godly if we are being authentic. But when we do those things to manipulate our image, or exert control, or prop up our popularity? Then we’re not walking in the light.

I had a moment of conviction, as I realized I need to talk with my kids more about this. A lot of days our prayers are the only thing we can do in response to scripture on behalf of our children. Today, let’s shift our conversations a little. Let’s talk about the motivation behind our actions, letting our kids in on our own struggles. Let’s encourage them to consider why they do what they do, reminding them as we remind ourselves that our acceptance is assured by Christ’s love and sacrifice. And not ours only, but that of everyone we encounter.

So we can be honest. We can admit when we got it wrong, whether in action, inaction, or motivation. Because “if we confess our sins he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1John 1:9)

You know what makes me mad? My kids’ clothes on the floor, getting stepped on and ultimately ruined. The kids don’t understand- they think I’m overreacting. Maybe I am, but I didn’t grow up with plenty. I struggled to find outfits that helped me fit in, so when I see my kids destroying something that cost money, something others don’t have- it makes me mad.

The problem is, I don’t always handle it well, so my analogy breaks down. But can we follow this thinking- just for a minute- to get a glimpse of the righteous wrath of God?

The thing we have to grasp, as followers of Christ, is that sin is sin be cause it is destructive. And what is destroyed is way more precious than a pair of $20 jeans from Old Navy. When we read about the wrath of God, it’s not the human, sinful, overblown wrath of an imperfect mom. It is the appropriate anger of a righteous God, in response to attitudes and behaviors that destroy his precious creation and the people he died to save.

We want our children to walk in the light. We want them to love God and his word, to obey from a sense of belonging in the family, with a feeling of overwhelming love.

But we also want them to have a healthy respect for the destructive nature of sin in a way that deepens both their love for God, and their understanding of his love for them. It’s a tall order- which is why we pray.

I often tell my kids- we are living in a snow globe, but since it is all we know we think it’s real.

It’s not.

And John is reminding us- and his first readers who had the same problem- that Jesus entered our slow globe, our reality. John saw, touched and heard the human Jesus, who came to make sure we know that there is an eternal reality outside the one we experience with our senses.

This is such a hard thing to keep in mind, so let me say what is true of every prayer. I need these prayers every bit as much as my kids do. One of the advantages of having kids, actually, is that we do for them what we often wouldn’t do for ourselves.

So today, as we pray for our kids, their future spouses, and their current friends, let’s pray for each other also.

So many, many of my friends are making the actual transition we have been planning toward for years- our kids are moving away. Others have kids who are staying home to work or pursue higher education while asserting more independence, and many of us are still tearfully looking at the move in the rear-view mirror. Military, trade school, career or college- it’s time to mark the change.

Will you join together in praying for these emerging adults, whether you are the one going through this or you just love someone who is? And let’s add a tag at the end for mamas and daddies who are learning to live a little more distant from the babies, ok? They might think they are adults, and our minds might agree, but our hearts are not convinced.

Most of us are a part of a family- have you ever had a family business? Something you all work together to accomplish, everyone with a unique role? Even if it’s just a work day with a club, you now what it’s like, right? Common goal, unified purpose, lots of personalities so maybe some arguing as well. If it’s really a family business you have two big priorities- you can’t walk away, and you have to get the job done.

There is a family that reaches back to the beginning of time- close, deeply and mutually dependent, and working toward one purpose. John himself was there when it was all explained, and now nothing would make him happier than for us to be a part. Join him, he invites, in koinonia– fellowship- with Moses, Abraham, Rahab. And of course, God and his Son, Jesus Christ. Family, yes. But also- purpose.

What an exciting invitation! And it comes first-hand from one who saw and heard and touched Jesus himself. One who shepherded the first century church with wisdom and love and was martyred for his faith. John says his joy is complete when we are all together in this family, this fellowship that functions in a practical way on earth.

We can relate when we think of the joy we experience watching our children share a toy, or welcome a new kid. We are beginning to see signs they will be joining the family business, and our hearts want to burst!

Today we begin praying through 1 John, asking God that our children will know the joy of fellowship with all those who have accepted the invitation- across the centuries and across the globe.

That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we looked upon and have touched with our hands, concerning the word of life— the life was made manifest, and we have seen it, and testify to it and proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and was made manifest to us— that which we have seen and heard we proclaim also to you, so that you too may have fellowship with us; and indeed our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son Jesus Christ. And we are writing these things so that our joy may be complete. I John 1:1-4

This seems like such a simple prayer here at the end of Luke 2:52, doesn’t it? Seems like to easiest thing in the world- be a good friend, have good friends. But it’s complicated- we’re human after all. We misunderstand, we are emotionally tone deaf, we lack self-awareness. And we can’t predict or control how it will all work out.

Two of the biggest decisions we make for our kids are where we go to church and where we send them to school. We look at leadership and doctrine, worship style and culture. We look at school location, test scores, courses of study available.

But I would argue that one of the most important factors in these decisions is unknowable and unpredictable, because it is the relationships our kids will form. We have no control over who our kids connect with, and no way to predict who will be their strongest influence, whether through friendship, teaching, mentoring, or youth leading.

And I am not the first to mention that there is a time when our kids will not hear us. They need to hear what we are saying, but they will only be able to hear if someone else says it.

And so we pray.

We pray for friendships among peers, and we pray for relationships with role-models and leaders. We pray our kids would be the answer to others’ prayers, and we pray that our kids’ friends would have the support and love they need- and that we as parents and grandparents could be what our kids’ friends need.

A simple prayer- yes. But that is the beauty of prayer- so simple, yet so profound.

Father, guide our kids to have strong and healthy relationships.

Growing in favor with God- can you even imaging what it would be like to hear God say to you, “Well done, my good and faithful servant”?

Now think of of us standing before our Father in heaven as our children, one by one, come into his presence.  Does your heart almost burst with joy to imagine God saying to our children, “Well done”?

This is our prayer today.

And let’s add- if we haven’t already- our children’s spouses. I know the grandparents in the group are thinking- aren’t they already in the “my children” category? For those with younger kids, spouses seem like such a distant idea.  Let’s bring them close for a moment and intentionally pray for them as well.

Have you told your kids you are praying for them this way? I would love to hear their response!

Good morning! I am excited to get into our prayer journey with this amazing community of friends!

We are starting out by praying that our kids grow like Jesus, so we have only one verse to pray through- Luke 2:52. We’ll come back to the first quality (wisdom) again and again, but the second is a little different.

“Jesus grew in wisdom, stature, and in favor with God and man.”

It appears Luke thought is was necessary to tell us Jesus grew physically- to the the right size and state needed.  So let’s take this as an opportunity to pray for our kids’ health.

Your family may have some of the biggies- I am thinking of those with diabetes, or rheumatoid arthritis, or depression or anxiety.  For you, I am praying.

Or you may struggle with healthy eating and exercise.  For you, I am praying.

Or you may just be in the “feeding and growing”phase with no major health concerns.  For you, I am praying.

If you are like me, you are almost physically struck with how important it is that our kids learn to take care of their bodies well. Ultimately, they will make their own choices about nutrition, exercise, sleep, and habits of mental health.  Why do we rarely think to pray about this? Let’s change that today.

Do you have any specifics we can pray together for you and your children? Remember, *your* kids may be like mine- kids you love no matter who parents them.

Father, the greatest material gift you have given to each of us is our physical body.  We pray that our children will learn habits of nutrition, exercise, sleep, and spiritual rhythms that will allow them to grow in healthfulness.  #prayersformychildren

 

I have a few great loves my heart returns to over and over, and I would like to invite you along as I join two of them in this blog.

I love my children, and I love reading the bible in order to know God and be transformed into his image.

Years ago, I realized my prayers for my children were often highjacked by daily struggles and worries.  Yes, I want to offer these everyday concerns to God.  But I also want my children to seek God to know him, and to experience his transformative power.  So I started adding prayers inspired by scripture reading, and it has become one of my favorite things to do.

Let me pause here for a minute.  Maybe I’ll tell you more in a future post, but I want to make sure I say this at least once.  That last paragraph- about daily struggles and kids being transformed- I’ve seen some tough things come up since I began this prayer journey.  I’m not talking about sweet Sunday-school issues- I’m talking about our kids dealing with betrayal, failure, sexting, alcohol, cocaine, self-harm, and more. We live in a hard world, and our kids face it every day.  They need a powerful, fierce faith.  Thank God that’s what they get in Jesus.  And I believe we have an awe-inspiring opportunity to   invite our heavenly Father into our daily struggles and also to ask for our kids to grow in godliness as revealed in scripture.

Would you like to join in? Twice I week I will post prayers inspired by scripture I am reading at the time.  I would love to hear your response to the same scripture, your prayers inspired by any scripture, or prayers that you come across written by other people.

Let’s jump in with a few prayers for our children to grow like Jesus based on Luke 2:52.

 But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. James 3:17

Father, guide our children so that they would seek your wisdom, and not the false wisdom of this world.  Keep them pure, and grow in them a deep love for peace, gentleness, willingness to yield, mercy, lack of favoritism and sincerity.  I pray their lives would be full of the fruit of good deeds.